Monday, June 12, 2006

I used to have a dream

I used to almost have this dream. A while back Bruce asked me to help lead a transgender support group. It didn't take long for me to get really excited about it. Before I would be allowed to talk to someone one-on-one I had to take a weekend course on peer-counselling. The feedback I got was that I was really good at it. I've never been one for talking to strangers - let alone talk about something serious - but here I was doing it and feeling so good about it. It was amazing to be able to talk to people about their troubles, and even more amazing that they felt it helped to talk to me.

Then probably one of the best boosts to my self-esteem happened. I was telling my psychiatrist that I had taken that course and this meant that if a TG called the Avenue Community Center and wanted to talk to another TG then they'd call me to set something up. That is when my psychiatrist told me that I'll have to let her know how it all goes, because she has some clients she'd send over to chat with me.

I was actually thinking that going back to school to learn to do something in the counselling arena would be worth considering. Then I met [name edited], and she has single-handedly demolished that dream. I've quit the transgender group altogether and I guess I'll be sticking with computer programming for a while yet.

8 comments:

Jason said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Sarah said...

I actually feel awful that I put her name in there. I am going to edit the name out of the post, but I can't edit your comment jason, so hope you are not offended if I delete it and repost it.

jason said...

The [name edited]'s of the world are the type who take a mile when given an inch of kindness. They are worse than a thief. At least a thief shows their intent upfront instead of hiding their unsavory "taking" by posing as a friend in need.

Ariia said...

While I don't know the details of what happened, I can only offer this advice. For every rotten person you deal with there will be at least one good one to make up for whatever they did wrong to you. Dealing with ignorant people happens in any proffession(wich I am sure you know) but don't let that dissuade you from doing something you love and that helps other people.

Besides, that which doesn't kill you makes you stronger...

good luck and cheer up :)

Jason said...

There is no way you would offend me, sweetheart.

Brendan said...

If I may ask, what did she who must not be named say to so turn you away from what you want? More importantly though... why are you letting her get in the way of what you want?

Sarah said...

This particular person seemed to speak as though she was the victim in every aspect of life. This alone tried my patience and depressed me to no end. On top of this there are a lot of transgenders out there who exhibit questionable behaviour and judgement and this person was no exception. Considering how this person reacted to her situations in life I truly began to understand why some people have an instant negative reaction to transgenders because I was getting that way myself! I decided it was time to distance myself from her specifically and other TG's until her taint has passed.

Brendan said...

I’ll tell you a little secret Sarah... a good number of the shrinks in the world see shrinks themselves in part because of the sort of thing you described, they are human after all.

I’m sorry to be going into advice mode here when you have no idea who I am... but what stops you from doing what the rest of them do... suffer through a little temporary frustration and peevedness at some of those you deal with for the satisfaction of being able to help them and others and better identify with some of them and their issues?