Today began at the hospital. I showed up and went to let the medical receptionist know I was there. She took my letter from the Dr, and my health card. She punched a bunch of keys on the keyboard and said she would be right back with my printout. As she walked back to me she was looking it over and she paused and said there was a mistake! She needed my card back again. So I handed her the card and she looked at it. I am pretty sure she was looking at the 'M' on the card and realized the 'M' on the printout wasn't a mistake afterall. She handed it back with a 'Oh! Nevermind.'
I am sure I am not the first transgender woman to visit the hormone doctor, so I was quite impressed with myself that she didn't clock me right away.
I was taken to a room and soon a doctor with an accent came in. I noticed that he often looked at my breasts. He was taking my medical history and between looking at my face and looking at his clipboard he would pause for an instant at my chest. Now I know he knows I am physically male, so my only theory is that he was trying to figure out what was inside my bra. I think with each glance he was thinking "Kleenexes?".... "socks?" ... "apples?"
Soon after the real doctor came in. His name is Dr Wilson. He is quite old, and he carries one of those doctor bags doctors from the 50's would carry on their way to house calls. He got me to stand up and he started measuring. He already had me weighed, and my height taken, and now he was measuring around my waist and around my hips. He told me a male has a waist to hip ratio of typically around 0.9 and up, and a woman's ratio is 0.8 or less. My ratio is 0.87, so he pointed out to me that it appeared as though I was less than the average male in that regard. Well despite the reason I was there, and the clothes I was wearing I also added that I am less than the average male in a LOT of ways.
I walked out with two prescriptions. One for anti-androgens - to block testosterone, and one for estrogen - to provide what my body lacks, but what most other women already get from nature. These are the particulars:
C.E.S 1.25 mg
1 per day
Total: $15.31 for 34 pills, $3.06 after Blue Cross
1 per day
Total: $31.29 for 100 pills, $6.26 after Blue Cross
I actually can't take these pills today like I had hoped.
I have to fast for 12 hours, then go for blood tests first. These tests are used for my 'baseline', so in three months when I go back to Dr Wilson he will take more blood tests to see how the hormones have changed things. After my blood tests I can only take the spiro, I have to wait two weeks to start taking the estrogen. I have a feeling I won't be able to wait the whole two weeks :)
My sister was very nice to me today. She not only got me a card in the shape of a butterfly (I identify with butterflies because I am like a butterfly), but she bought me some candles, some butterfly fridge magnets, and a butterfly beanie baby named Flitter. The tag on the beanie baby says:
I did not know what I was meant to be
Covered in fuzz, it was hard to see
Now a butterfly, what a beautiful sight
On silken wings I take to flight.
Tomorrow I get my wings...