Tuesday, May 17, 2005
Walking is Good for the Heart
Well here we go Day Two coming to work dressed as a woman is over and I don't really feel any net difference. Yes it was amazing, I felt so ME, yet I still have a gaping hole that needs to be filled somehow. This is a serious problem that goes back to August. I was certain all I needed to do was tell someone I was transgendered, so I made an appointment with a counselor. Then after I talked to her in September I discovered a sudden need to tell my friends. Before long I needed internet hormones, then I needed to talk to a doctor, then I needed laser hair removal, then I needed a psychiatrist, then I needed to change my name. Do you see a pattern? Each thing I did didn't satisfy me like I thought it would. Yes it made me extremely happy and excited, but it still seems that I haven't figured out what I really need yet. It is like I am walking in a strange city looking for a certain location. I know the general direction, so I can tell I am making progress. I keep thinking my destination is right around the corner, but as soon as I round the corner I realize my goal wasn't as close as I thought, so I start walking towards the next corner. It almost feels like a never ending journey, but anything is better than standing still - besides, I am enjoying the walk.
Posted by Sarah J M at 7:27 PM
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